The original idea was to cover the Democratic and the Republican National Conventions. And all of Trump’s “events.” And all of the Biden and Harris events. Because I am tough, goddammit. I can totally handle all of the political shenaniganry. No sweat! Like water off a tarp, or however the saying goes. I mean, I managed to do that in 2016, right? Why should now be any different?
On Monday, I live tweeted both of Trump’s “events” (he called them “friendly protests.” Ew) and those two events kicked my soul’s ass. I do not remember the last time I felt that world-weary and tired and defeated. Even my bone marrow felt like it was giving up. It felt like I was filling up with The Ooze from Fern Gully.
It was dark enough in here that I couldn’t bring myself to watch the first night of the Democratic National Convention, and on Tuesday I took most of the day off from the internet. And people. I took a lot of naps, I watched a lot of NCIS (shut up, it’s soothing). I played silly games on my phone and wrestled with Poppy. I felt better in the evening, but not enough to watch the second night of the convention.
Yesterday, I was scrolling through social media, checking out the reviews of the first two nights of conventioning. Everybody loved Michelle Obama’s speech. Some people were put off by what they thought was an overly schmaltzy approach in the new format. Others loved the new format and said they hoped we never go back to the old way. Pretty predictable stuff, right?
What I didn’t predict was just how dang annoyed I’d feel as I scrolled. Over and over again I saw tweets whose message was something along the lines of “THE DNC LET SOMEONE I DON’T LIKE SAY WORDS. THEY SUCK. THEY ARE THE ENEMY OF EVERYTHING AND MUST BE DESTROYED. I’M NEVER VOTING AGAIN UNLESS THEY CATER ONLY TO MY EXACT WISHES.”
Obviously, I haven’t seen anything that literally said that exact message. I want to be clear about that. But the sentiment was there, in tweet after tweet after tweet after Facebook post after Facebook post after Facebook post.
Y’all, I am so flippin’ sick of this kind of BS. THIS BS is one of the reasons our country is in this mess in the first place. And I’m reaching the point where I do not trust myself not to go full SNARKE SMASH on every person I see posting it…at least not right now.
Let me be clear: All of us have the right to post whatever we want (mostly). I would never tell someone what they are “allowed” to post about.
But right now? I do not have the patience or the filter to not excoriate every person in my feed (some of whom I love dearly!) who writes posts like that.
SO. I’m stepping back. I didn’t watch the convention last night and I probably won’t watch tonight. I’m not going to watch the Republican Convention next week and will be taking a huge step back from social media until it is over. I am angry and exhausted and just…cannot with all of this right now.
I’m hoping that the time away will help me rest and reboot so that I’ll be ready to take on the next two months with the energy it will require. I’m hoping to figure out what kind of approach to take to, well, everything that will let me keep posting without filling me up with The Ooze(tm).
Of course, I’m not PLANNING anything. We all know how that turns out in 2020.