Heard just now in my apartment:

“Okay, I know I can’t publish this but read it before I erase it.”

“HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA.  Shmiko ward!”

“I know! It’s damn funny and I can’t use it! This sucks!”

So.  The Drama. And the Story.  And the wow I wish I could spell out every single detail but some of it involves personal details that aren’t really mine to share.   This is my attempt to spell it out without…spelling it out.

The short version is this: he is out.  The bridge, as far as we are concerned, has been burned.  He still has some things here and we have given him until the weekend to come and get them.  If he doesn’t pick them up by then we are either claiming them as our own or tossing them out.  We have had it. Because the drama this single person causes? Holy crap.

I’ve written about the rules we were supposed to draw up already.  The roommate got home early Wednesday afternoon.  He read the rules.  We gave him a chance to ask questions or to talk to us about the rules but he agreed that they were fair (though he wasn’t happy about his not being allowed to be alone in the apartment with me anymore).  He signed the “contract”, took a shower and left.  It seemed like he was in a good mood.

Less than three hours later he is already trying to get out of a couple of the rules.

Around nineish hours after signing the contract Will starts getting bombarded by text messages from Roommate’s friend (who, incidentally has always flat out said no whenever Roommate asked to live with him).  Roommate’s friend starts calling me names to Will via these text messages and saying that I’m rude and that our contract is crap.  The “conversation” moves to instant messenger where the friend proceeds to keep Will (and I because I wasn’t going to leave Will to deal with it alone) awake until TWO A.M.  He called Will names, called me names, came thisclose to calling me a liar, insulted my Mom and kept demanding explanations for the rules on the contract–the contract that not half a day earlier had been deemed fair.  The worst part of it was when he said that Will was not a man because he was defending me instead of telling me to go to hell and letting the roommate continue to do whatever he wanted.

So that was not fun.

The next afternoon (this past Thursday), while Will was in class, the roommate starts text messaging Will, and would. not. stop.  Somewhere in the neighborhood of thirty text messages got sent to Will in around seventy to eighty minutes.  The roommate went on and on about how he shouldn’t have to follow the rules of the contract, that I freaked out on him (apparently repeatedly) and talked to him like he was beneath me.  He said that we were just trying to kick him while he was down and that we were trying to punish  him and make him feel like a criminal.  The dude would not leave Will alone.  About halfway through the text message parade, Will calls me and tells me to get the roommate’s stuff together.

So, yeah, the roommate is out.  Most of his stuff is still here.  He kept putting off coming to get it and then had the audacity to ask Will if he could keep it here but could he please stop by to get some clothes.  Will told him that we are not a storage unit and, when the roommate showed up to pick up his clothes, laptop and XBox, Will told him that he has until this weekend to get the rest of it or we’ll either keep it or throw it out. He said he’d be here tonight (Monday) but we haven’t heard from him at all. Big surprise.

Oh and apparently he deleted me from his messenger list.  Look at me.  Soooo Sad.  I should cry.  Or not. Who knew that asking a person who was taking advantage of you to start acting like a decent human being was such a horrible thing to do?

To be honest, I have not yet begun to relax after everything.  I probably won’t until all of the roommate’s stuff is out of my home and I don’t have to worry about him anymore–though at the rate at which rumors are spreading about us through Will’s social circle… that might take a while.

Will says that we aren’t going to take in any more strays unless we’ve both known them forever, like them and they are mentally stable.  Here’s to hopin’!

In happier news I am now the proud owner of both “stupidcrazydrama.com” and “makethedramastop.com”.  I’m not entirely sure what I’ll do with them but after the last couple of weeks I could not resist buying both domain names.